Hello again and welcome to all! Last post was about disillusionment and the terror of your illusory reality shattering before your eyes. So, now that you have settled into disillusionment, it’s time to dig into those puzzle pieces and start putting your new picture together. Stage Two: Introspection, has to be the most complicated of In-volution because it requires honesty with self. It’s easy to put on a smile in public, tell people everything is ok, go out and have fun, etc. However, when you are back to sitting at home alone, that illusion crumbles again and you are back to feeling less than, sad, or dissatisfied with your life. You can either wallow in that sorrow of dissatisfaction or you can start your own personal questionnaire. By that I mean, it’s time to start asking yourself the hard questions that most would rather avoid.
I decided to do this post slightly differently by providing some great introspective questions that I’ve gathered from numerous resources. These questions will serve as a way to get into your subconscious mind, so that you can know what you truly believe about yourself. Aside from surfing your brain, these questions will lead you down the rabbit hole of past experiences, familial impact, and social encounters, that have added to why you created this illusion in the first place. Introspection, like the other stages, is ongoing. For me, even after spending months alone with myself, I still need to introspect when I feel off-kilter. Introspection is a form of grounding for me. When I’m unhappy with what my reality looks like, taking a moment to introspect really helps me to hold myself accountable. In other words, it’s a reality check with yourself. Also, I recommend getting a journal or notebook to record the things you discover along your journey of In-volution. I have accumulated about 6 journals now (wow, right) and for me it’s the best method of releasing my thoughts. The journal does not have to only be for self discovery, it could be for ideas, stories about vacations, how your day went etc. The point is, journals are an awesome way to keep track of your growth. So many times, I’ve gone back to one of my old journals, read a few pages, and then cried because I’m no longer in the headspace that I was in when writing it. It’s like a natural hair growth journey. If you take pictures over time and then look at those pictures, you see that your hair is in fact flourishing even though it seems like you’ve only grown an inch of hair. Moving along, let’s get into these questions. When you answer these questions, remember to be honest, compassionate and nonjudgmental. If certain words/thoughts come to mind first, don’t try to deny them, accept them and write it down.
- What are 3 positive words I would use to describe myself?
- What are 3 traits that I do not like about myself?
- When I was younger, what things did I enjoy doing? Do I still do those things? Why or why not?
- Do I hold grudges? Why do I think I hold on to these grudges?
- When was a time when I felt betrayed, hurt, or rejected? How did I react in that situation?
- What emotion(s) do I try to avoid?
- How did my parent(s)/guardian(s) comfort me when I was upset or got hurt?
- Thinking back to a time when someone broke my heart: In what ways was I responsible? Did I bypass signs to leave this person? Why did I stay?
- What do I need to forgive myself for?
- What do I need to forgive my parents for?
- When I was younger, what experience do I remember most? What experience do I avoid? Why?
- How do I deal with emotional discomfort?
- Do I have any addictions? If so, When do I feed into these addictions? What feelings am I avoiding by feeding the addiction?
- In what ways do I minimize my voice to keep the peace?
- How do I care for myself? (try to name non-materialistic things)
- How can I prioritize myself more?
- Who did I vent to when I was younger? Who do I vent to now?
- What activities or actions do I take part in to receive love or approval?
- What fears do I have currently? Who or what planted those fears?
- Who or what experiences spark negative emotions in my heart when thinking of them?
- What is your favorite quote, song or saying? How does this resonate with you?
- What patterns keep occurring in my relationships? (includes friends, family, and intimate)
- What is my sexuality? Am I comfortable being sexual? Am I comfortable in my body? Why or why not?
- How do I dim myself to be accepted? How do I conform to be accepted?
- Name 5 ways you can improve your health. Mental, Emotional, Physical, Financial, and Social
Those are just a few questions that I hope will help you as you begin your stage of Introspection. Some of the questions were found on Pinterest posts so shoutout to them and others I came up with. Taking a trip down memory lane of your past can sometimes be hard depending on what you dealt with growing up and throughout your adult years. I hope that you decide to plunge deep within as the winter months grace their presence among us. Allow yourself the safe space to be honest with yourself as you get to know yourself, the good and bad. Growth is constant and even if you hate who you are now, introspection can truly help you to begin to love who you are because it allows understanding. If we understand why we do something, then we can begin to improve. Thank you for tuning in and I love you all!
Take home message: “Even in darkness, stars are born.”
With Luv always,
Kyla Robinson